Believe it or not, I make a conscious effort to not be the mom constantly snapping pictures of her children. I work to be the woman who enjoys the moment for the moment itself. That’s not to say I don’t fill up memory cards at a regular interval, but I do try to stay cognitive of my “say cheese and look happy!” moments.
However, I keep a running memo on my phone of things I find hilarious. These small people of mine talk all the time. It’s grown exponentially as Olivia, my 2-and-a-half-year-old princess, has started discovering new words daily. My new favorite phrase of hers is “What you talkin’ about, Mama?” Today, it was soy sauce.
And so, without further ado, here are some of the potentially (or, completely, in my case) adorable things from the brains of my small children.
George has hit a Bible phase, where he’s learning everything he can about the Bible. Here, I was attempting to explain communion:
Mama: …and that’s why we eat bread and a little cup of juice–or wine–at church.
George: I don’t get wine. I get apple juice. And we don’t always have bread…
Mama: Well, it’s not a snack…
George in the bathroom…
Olivia: Go wipe him!
Mama (lazing on couch): I will if he needs me to!
Olivia: You love him! Go wipe him!
“And I know it is totally crazy
To dream I’d find romance
But for the first time in forever
At least I’ve got a chance.” –Frozen soundtrack
George: Did she just say “Romans”?
Mama: Wait, what? Oh, no! She said “romance,” but they do sound similar, don’t they?
Again, he’s fascinated with all things biblical at the moment.
Mama: You know? We could have another baby sister in our family someday!
George: I don’t want another sister. I want another grown up.
He has asked for this more than once.
Mama: Well, I love you the best!
Olivia: I love me the best too!
George: When people don’t believe in Jesus, they go down the hall. When people believe in Jesus, they go to heaven.
A friend of mine had a baby…
Mama: Hey! Remember our friends who came over to visit last week? The mommy had her baby! Her baby isn’t in her belly anymore!
…looks at Facebook pictures…
George: How do babies get out of mommy’s bellies?
Mama: Ah crap (she said internally). Um, well, there are two ways. First, a doctor can cut a little hole and take the baby out. Second, uh, well, uh…babies come out of mommies’ peeps.
George: Ponders. But I thought that’s where babies breathe?
Cuddling with Olivia on my bed…
Olivia: Your hair smells like Play-doh! Like Peppa Pig!
Mama: Uh, thank you?
Olivia to shopkeeper: I sleepy!
Shopkeeper: Oh, you’re sleepy?
Olivia: I growing.
Mama: She says she’s growing.
Olivia: I grow so tall!
Toddler translator is one of my main jobs these days.
George: Why don’t daddies have babies in their tummies? Why is it only mommies?
Mama: Uh, well, mommies can’t have babies without daddies.
George: So, with Mary and Joseph…
Mama: That is literally the hardest situation to explain…
George: You know what my favorite country is? Djibouti! Because it has “booty” in it! (cracks up)
Oh, I hope I translate these well enough for you. It’s hard to know since some of them, I’m sure, are “had to be there!” funny, at least to me. And, well, you now can chuckle anytime you happen to be discussing Djibouti. *wink face!*
The Lady in the Coppergate Tower by Nancy Campbell Allen – So, I started reading all that Ms. Allen has written because I loved Beauty and the Clockwork Beast (I’m a sucker for Beauty and the Beast retellings. Fun fact!). I then went back and read some of her older books. She’s clearly gotten better with time. This one, however, is her newest, and I feel like I’m slogging through it. I’m going to finish it, but I was hoping for something a little more gripping. It’s a retelling of Rapunzel with a mash-up of steampunk, Victorian times, and magic. It’s just a bit slow.